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Saturday, 21 March 2015 15:54

I Only Have Two Hands!

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Question:

I am a young mother of a baby under two years.  I have a full-time job as well. 

At home I have to prepare supper, and breakfast and lunch every evening for the next day.  I also have to prepare my baby’s food.  I have all the washing and cleaning to do as well. 

At work I am overloaded because a colleague went on medical leave and I have to do her job as well as my own.

My husband expects a clean house but does not help me, even with the baby.  I have talked to him about giving up my job, but he does not want me to.  He just says I am not the first woman who is going through this phase and I must cope.

In the past few weeks I have had the most unbearable backache, and I am falling behind with everything.  What can I do to get back on top of things again?

 

Answer:

I understand your situation - I have been in a similar situation with a similar husband.

I don't think your husband will change.  He obviously does not understand or care beyond his own comfort and if you try to convince him that you are not coping, he will not be sympathetic.

I can recommend a few things that you can do.   At work, you can make a list of everything you need to do every day, and then decide what you absolutely have to do so that you can stay out of trouble. Then focus on doing those tasks.  If people complain, ask them to set your priorities for you, and then focus on what they want.  

You are only one person, and there is only so much you can do.

At home, you could follow the same strategy.  Your child needs your attention more than your husband, because your child is small only once. You don't have to be the perfect housewife.

You need to provide clean clothes (one set for each day, no more) and put a meal on the table (not a fancy meal, just a wholesome meal).  You need to clean your house as far as you can cope.  If your house is not perfect, make sure your child is happy.

If your husband complains, you can remind him gently that you only have two hands and so many hours in a day, and that you are doing the best you can.  When you say that to him, remain calm and don't allow him to upset you.  You know that you are doing your best, and that things will improve as your child grows older.

If you have a friend who can look after your child for a few hours every second weekend, don't hesitate to ask.  Then use that time either to do urgent things, or to do nothing and just take a break by yourself.

It would also help to do some daily meditation and, if you can, to take some vitamins to keep your strength.

To read more about dealing with relationship issues:

Click here if you are in the UK.

Click here if you are outside the UK.

Read 944 times Last modified on Saturday, 21 March 2015 16:31
Elsabe Smit

Elsabe Smit is a well-known author, clairvoyant, and public speaker.

Elsabe helps people to understand the mysteries of life and Love, so that they can regain control of their lives. What would you like to resolve?

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