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Sunday, 23 August 2015 11:52

My Mother and Grandmother Are Stalking Me

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Question:

 

I used to get along so well with both my mother and my grandmother, and I love them both dearly.  My husband and I lived in another town, but moved closer to my mother because we are planning to have a baby soon and could do with the help.

 

That is where the problems started.

 

My mother now wants to know everything about me and my husband – especially me – and it is getting out of hand.  When she does not hear from me often enough, she calls me and leaves hysterical messages.  She wants to hear from me every day, and I refuse to call her that often. 

 

My grandmother lives just up the street and doesn’t call me every day, but she has another way of stalking me.  When she does call and I don’t respond, she simply walks to my house and enters without knocking.  I have asked her not to do it, but she just ignores me. 

 

When my grandmother wants to go anywhere, she just marches up to my house and expects me to leave everything and take her.  When I refuse she goes and sits in the car waiting for me.

 

Both of them want to know when my husband and I go out and when we return, and if we don’t call them, they both freak out about my safety – as if my husband can’t take care of me!

 

We are at a point where we just want to pack our stuff and move away, and have a baby without even telling them about it.

 

Please don’t tell me to talk to them about this, because I know it won’t make any difference.   What else can I do to get them out of my hair?

 

 

Answer:

 

Firstly I promise I will not say ‘talk to them’ because that is clearly not a solution.
The solution I want to offer you is unconventional and will require some discipline from you but I have used it myself in similar situations and also with clients.


First some background:  even if you don't believe what I am writing here, assume it is true for the moment.  Let's say you come into this world having a contract with all the significant people in your life - which would include your mother and grandmother.  This contract is meant to help you learn about yourself and become whole.

 

What is the nature of the contract?  Normally you first have to live through the

experience, and then you look back and discover the wisdom that you were meant to learn from these people who act as your teachers.  Of course you can get psychic or spiritual advice on the nature of your contract with your mother and grandmother, but this is not the place for it - I am giving you the tool to get to the wisdom yourself.

 

Once you understand what the wisdom is and you get as far as thanking your teachers with true gratitude, the teachers back off and you can get on with your life.  This is why I know that it will make no difference for you to talk to them.

 

They will not back off just from talking.  What you need to do is get to the bottom of this, because that will make them back off even if you say nothing to them.
How do you do this?  Here are the instructions.  It is important that you follow the instructions to the letter, because that is what makes the magic happen in your brain and between you and your mother and grandmother.

 

Take an A4 sheet of paper and divide it into two columns.

 

Write this heading on the left hand column:  I love the attention I get from my mother and grandmother.

 

Write this heading on the right hand column:  I dislike the attention I get from my mother and grandmother.

 

Then divide each one of those columns in two again and give each column the heading Advantage and Disadvantage.

 

You will have a left hand column with a main heading of I love the attention I get from my mother and grandmother, and the sub-headings of Advantages and Disadvantages, and a similar right hand column with the opposite statement.

 

Now this is where the discipline and the magic starts.  It does not matter which column you start writing in first, you HAVE to first complete the entire line before you can write a second line.

 

For example: It would be easy to first think of a disadvantage of the attention you get, namely that it takes up a lot of your time.  Now what is the advantage of this attention from them?  You feel wanted.

 

Now move to the other column.  Assume that you dislike the attention of your mother and grandmother.  What is the advantage?  You know you will never act like them because you know better.  And the disadvantage of disliking their attention?  It eats you up inside because you want to love them.

 

Now you are ready to start on the second line and do the same.

 

Carry this sheet of paper with you and complete a full line (all four columns) every time you become aware of the next thing that you feel or observe because of their behaviour.

 

I know this sounds cumbersome and hard work, but every time you complete a line, you get closer to a point where you will experience no emotion when they act the way they do, and they will not succeed in upsetting you in any way.  When you get to that point, you will be able to be firm with them without feeling guilt or

any other destructive emotion.

 

As you progress with this, you will also notice a change in their behaviour without having to discuss anything with them.  They will feel the difference in you, and on an unconscious level they will know that they have fulfilled their contract with you, and they will back off.

 

If you do not follow this approach and rather move away from them again, you may end up with a neighbor that will treat you in the same way, and that will be an even bigger nightmare.  The sooner you get to the bottom of this and get into a position where you can actually thank them for being your teachers, the sooner you can get on with your life and be in control of the situation.

 

Read 1167 times Last modified on Tuesday, 07 February 2017 09:18
Elsabe Smit

Elsabe Smit is a well-known author, clairvoyant, and public speaker.

Elsabe helps people to understand the mysteries of life and Love, so that they can regain control of their lives. What would you like to resolve?

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