Sometimes people get stuck in grief. If you are willing to accept help moving on, there is a lovely life waiting for you.
My mom passed away nine years ago when I was ten years old. I feel I have dealt with it, but I don’t think my dad has.
He has quite a stressful job, and comes home shouting at me and my sister for the tiniest things. This has been getting worse over the past year or so. I would not say he is abusive – I can see that when he raises his voice something stops him and he actually feels embarrassed without us saying anything.
He has not dated since my mom passed away, and I think he feels the loss even more when he does not have a partner to talk things through with. His stress is affecting everyone in the house.
I am also worried about his physical health since he has started drinking quite a lot. I wouldn’t say he is an alcoholic, but I am worried that it will get worse.
I want to go to university soon, but I can see that he wouldn’t cope without me, and I don’t want my little sister to take over from me and spend her life caring for him.
How do I get my dad to agree to family counselling? I feel that would have a better chance than me asking him to go for personal counselling – he has his pride
We cannot change the choices our parents make. We can only love them for what they teach us.
I have recently turned 20 and moved out of my parents’ home because I could not stand staying there any longer.
My parents are always fighting about money, but I can see how they cause their own money troubles. My dad has been unemployed for a long time and he smokes weed to relieve his stress. He can come up with the craziest things, and then gets frustrated and embarrassed, which makes it very difficult to speak to him.
My mom has a job that she hates, and she drinks two bottles of wine every night to deal with her stress. I work as a waiter and I have seen people sharing a bottle of wine and having a good time. I can see my mother does not have a good time – she drinks because she does not want to face her problems. When I try to talk to her, she says it is her money and she will do as she pleases.
My sisters dose themselves with prescription drugs and drink and smoke weed. I think they have also already tried crystal meth. I have tried to talk to them but they say if our parents can do it, why can’t they?
I don’t want you to think I am judging them. I have experimented with drugs and weed, but one day I had an experience where I felt God was reaching out to me and I just knew this was not what I wanted in my life. Now I will only take medication if the doctor prescribed it and there is no other way.
Even though I no longer live at home, I am really stressed about my family. Despite everything I love them and I know I can’t change them, but I want the best for them.
Can you help me?