I am due to have a baby in the next few weeks. I have everything ready for the baby for the first few months, and my mother has also contributed a lot.
Currently my boyfriend and I live in the attic of his parents’ house. We don’t have much privacy. We have planned this and agreed to move into our own place two months from now. This is not the best time to move, because my boyfriend recently got arrested for drunk driving. As a result he now has to pay court fees and other fines and I have only now discovered how much debt he has on his credit card. I also have some, but I have a firm plan to pay it off within the next five months.
My mother is now nagging for us to move out at the end of this month, and says she will help us with a deposit. She has calculated that with my maternity benefits and my boyfriend’s salary we should be OK for a few months. My boyfriend’s mother, on the other hand, wants us to stay here for another six months and first pay off our debts.
Both my mother and my boyfriend’s mother are telling me all the time how I should raise my baby - and this is even before the baby is born!
Now my boyfriend says I am selfish because I insist that we ignore both our mothers and stick to the plan we agreed to. He says I am not thinking about the baby, when in fact he is the one who made stupid decisions. I am the one who has been saving and buying things for the baby.
I feel stuck in the middle, and I am being treated as if I have no opinion of my own. How do I get control of my situation?
Getting a sibling when you are already an adult requires you to re-think and adjust to many things.
I am 43 years old and have been married for 25 years. We have three daughters. The eldest two are both married and pregnant. The youngest is 16 and getting ready for college. We have been very happy with our lovely family.
Over the past two years my periods have been receding. I thought I was approaching menopause, and my husband and I stopped using birth control. We are still having sex a few times a month. Over the past few weeks I have been feeling really unwell. The doctor confirmed yesterday that I am fourteen weeks pregnant.
As you can imagine this has been quite a shock to all of us. We have discussed it and of course for me and my husband there is only one option – to have the baby. My older daughters were surprised but they have accepted it.
However, my teenage daughter is very upset by it all. She does not want to speak to us, and stays out all day and as late as she can. She did say that the baby will ruin her future, but then she ran away and now she does not even look at me or my husband.
How do I help my teenage daughter accept the situation?